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How to Preserve the Muslim Family
By Sumayyah bint Joan
Muslim
families are at the crossroads today. The Western model is not a
suitable pattern for the family life. Its style of family life
has resulted in conjugal infidelity, large scale marriage
breakdown, high rates of divorces, separations, broken homes,
alcoholism, drug addiction, libertinism and the like.
Those who blindly mimic Western model, exploit their women to
such an extent that the latter are made mere sex objectives. The
only solution to the Muslim family's predicament is maintenance
of Islamic family values. Islam builds the family
on solid grounds, which are capable of providing continuity,
security, mutual love and intimacy.
With a view to making the foundations of the family strong
and natural, Islam not only recognizes but also lays emphasis on
marriage, which is a wholesome pattern of lawful intimacy
harmoniously blended with decency, morality and gratification.
Marriage and the family are the focal point in the Islamic
system. There are many verses in the Qur'an and many statements
of the Prophet (Pbuh), which declare marriage to be a moral
safeguard and a religio-social commitment.
The aim of the Muslim family must be worship of Allah, as
marriage is considered to be yet another form of Ibadah
(Worship). If the aim of the family is carnal satisfaction or
worldly gains, then the family institution fails miserably.
The responsibility of the family does not revolve solely on
the husband or the wife or on children or grandchildren. It is a
collective responsibility on all of them together and even
beyond that to the previous generation of grandparents.
A family can be a Muslim family, only if parents behave
correctly and follow the Sunnah.
If they do not live in accordance with the Sunnah, they have
no right to hope or expect their children to be good Muslims. As
you sow, so you reap. Cultivation of Islamic values is essential
in a Muslim family and they should not only be cultivated but
also nurtured. Our likes and dislikes, our conception of nice
and vulgar, good and neat and chaotic, etc., must be in
conformity with the Sunnah, for the Prophet(Pbuh) is reported to
have said: "The one among you does not believe unless his own
desires and likings are in conformity with what I have brought."
This applies to personal habits, dress, food manners, etc.,
For the preservation and maintenance of the Muslim family,
there must be instilled in its members a strong sense of
belonging to the Muslim Ummah. The family is not an individual
entity; it is a social aspect and so must be strengthened.
A Muslim family must socialize with other Muslim families.
Parents must, no doubt, avoid corrupt people and refrain from
socializing in sick environment. And also their children should
do the same.
At the same time, they must provide better alternatives and
there can be no better alternative than befriending good
Muslims, especially Ulamas (scholars).
These are some ways of promoting and preserving the Muslim
family. In conclusion, I fervently appeal to my
fellow-religionists to remain continuously conscious and
creative about the Islamic aspects.
Educated Muslims must apply the Islamic concepts; "think",
"contemplate", "look", "realize", "know", "become wise",
"reason", etc., on the Muslim society, and help in
transformation of the Qur'anic and Prophetic concepts of the
family into our daily life.
A family can be a Muslim family, only if parents behave
correctly and follow the Sunnah.
If they do not live in accordance with the Sunnah, they have
no right to hope or expect their children to be good Muslims. As
you sow, so you reap. Cultivation of Islamic values is essential
in a Muslim family and they should not only be cultivated but
also nurtured. Our likes and dislikes, our conception of nice
and vulgar, good and neat and chaotic, etc., must be in
conformity with the Sunnah, for the Prophet(Pbuh) is reported to
have said: "The one among you does not believe unless his own
desires and likings are in conformity with what I have brought."
This applies to personal habits, dress, food manners, etc.,
For the preservation and maintenance of the Muslim family,
there must be instilled in its members a strong sense of
belonging to the Muslim Ummah. The family is not an individual
entity; it is a social aspect and so must be strengthened.
A Muslim family must socialize with other Muslim families.
Parents must, no doubt, avoid corrupt people and refrain from
socializing in sick environment. And also their children should
do the same.
At the same time, they must provide better alternatives and
there can be no better alternative than befriending good
Muslims, especially Ulamas (scholars).
These are some ways of promoting and preserving the Muslim
family. In conclusion, I fervently appeal to my
fellow-religionists to remain continuously conscious and
creative about the Islamic aspects.
Educated Muslims must apply the Islamic concepts; "think",
"contemplate", "look", "realize", "know", "become wise",
"reason", etc., on the Muslim society, and help in
transformation of the Qur'anic and Prophetic concepts of the
family into our daily life.
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